saving money

 My topic for the next few weeks will be how to save money in the home. We ( my family) have decided to save for a home (thus cutting the extras) but how do you do that and save money? I know there are common ways to save money such as don't eat out, find no-cost babysitting and other advice, but i am talking about the other mystery things that people do that save on groceries, house cleaning supplies and tips i have yet to find. Here is my beginner list of how i plan to save my family money:

1. Only eating out 1 x a month...i may be overly ambitious but this includes my occasional stop at the coffee stand for peppermint hot chocolate. This also includes not stopping somewhere to get fries for Landon and cooking my own dinner even if i don't feel up to it.

2. buying in bulk: I must say that not all buying in bulk seems to be cost effective, but for us buying meats, grains, sugar, flour, brown sugar, tortillas (i could make these myself, but i don't know if i want to spend time doing so) and beans seems effective. i am also going to look into buying items to make my own laundry detergent and possibly baby wipes( there are a lot of recipes on pinterest that say i can do it).

3. cleaning for my father : my dad is being generous and helping me save a little money by cleaning his house once a week.

4. cutting out or down daycare: i am really not sure which one, my toddler loves going to school with other kids, yet we pay $300 a month for 3xs a week.

5. we pay close to $200 on our phones each month, my husband and i are going to pay our early termination fee and get prepaid cell phone plans for awhile. neither of us really use our phone for more than just calling and texting anyway.

6. instead of paying for a gym membership here in my local area, i have decided to go with my dad to the fire hall in the next town to do P90x with him and his friend. i know i would workout more and possibly save time if i exercised closer to home, but i think the cost of membership wouldnt' be worth it.

7. baking instead of buying: i will be making any treats we consume, i will not be buying any goodies.

8. cooking and packing lunches for my husband.

9. taking all the old clothes to the consignment shop, the one near me will pay for children's clothes in in store credit, which allows me to buy new clothes for the kids without spending extra money. i tried selling on ebay..but no one wanted cute boys clothes.

10. i solemnly swear that i will put my debit card in a sealed envelope, only to be used in medical emergencies.

i know for the most part that saving money is pretty much a goal for everyone, who wouldn't want more money, right? but from my beginning look at how to save money i have realized that saving money is about what your problem areas are for your own family. some of you may not have daycare, but spend every dinner eating out. i suggest looking at your families expenses and decide what you are willing to give up for your financial goals and or even do less of. i will post what i find in my search to find more ways to save.

Today i finally have the dishes done from monday's procrastination. I planned the rest of the months meals and realized that i am making it harder on myself that it needs to be.
I think sometimes when we don't know something or understanding something we procrastinate doing so out of fear...sometimes fear that we are going to like doing it, others fear of what happens if i do it.  well, in the case of dishes i was just fearing the smell and what i would have to reach my hand into in order for it to go away.
Planning meals, i have come to realize, is not as much a science, but a lesson in preparation and the ability one has to cook.  i do not need to research blogs or other websites to know that if i buy in bulk and portion it, then it will last longer. though i must admit, those blogs and websites were helpful. I just wish that there was a way to portion all food out, that way when you buy something you are not tempted to go overboard. We don't eat meat very often, so i can say that we still have a large frozen supply. What should i do next fellow cleaning and organizing afficianados?

birthday procrastination

Well, Yesterday was my birthday. Which to meant i get to spend the day how I want. Now that the day is past, I feel like it really isn't my day anymore. Its a day like any other. A day to clean, wash dishes, feed everyone.(I got out of the last part by going out to dinner, except that i had a cake at home and now need to wash dishes from cake) I think I have finally realized that while my kids are young, my life is not my own nor will it be for a long time...possibly when i die, but even then? probably not. I feel unsure how to continue being myself and yet be a good mommy and wife.

today I am picking up the house, the dishes and the laundry. I am most sad that after not doing anything for a day that the world didnt see that it was my birthday and that on my birthday the laundry is supposed to do its self like mickey's brooms in fantasia without the bigger mess at the end.

It seems like being myself would be a selfish desire, yet, as i have started reading Parenting with Love and Logic i realize that being myself is the best example for my children. I have only read the first chapter and have realized that i may appear to not care much about what my children do, i find myself being overprotective, which really doesn't help them out in life. The book gives the example of God being a loving and caring parent to mankind, yet he allows us to make mistakes, even if it means jumping off the tallest building in the world. (just an fyi the world's tallest man-made structure is the 829.8 m (2,722 ft) tall Burj Khalifain Dubai) 
the book suggests (against my mommy feelings) that being hit in the nose by a bully or falling off the table is a life lesson worth the cost of pain. yet, my mommy feelings want to rescue him from the situations....so, what do you think? 

meal planning part 2

On tuesday i went shopping for bulk items. I bought beef, steak and chicken. we don't usually eat meat and when we do we don't eat very much so i thought if i portioned the bulk meat that it would last us a long time. When i finally finished portioning the meat we had over 60 portions of meat. I was pretty proud of myself for dividing everything up. i spent 92 dollars on about 65 portions of meat which equals 1.42 per portion. Is that good? I think that is a good price.  i do believe that i may buy a freezer dedicated to frozen food items. my freezer is small and now is packed with small portions of meat. i am sure there is more that i can freeze. maybe i should stock up on butter...what other items can you freeze?

I also have the next two weeks planned out for meals. i varied the meals based on ethnicity and made sure to include a few easy days for when the house might be a little crazy or my birthday coming up. 

I made a chore list to help me remember what to do everyday.

Daily

Make bed ( you would be amazed what making a bed does to your attitude about the rest of the day)

dishes (as I cook and after i eat)

wipe down counters and table

feed the dog

1 load of laundry

Weekly

Vacuum

sweep

clean bathroom

clean landon's room

i have done pretty good this week so far, but its only wednesday. 

It usually doesn't take more than a half hour to finish my daily list. On mondays i am going to plan my meals for a week ahead of time.  I have noticed that it makes me feel good when i sit down after i have done my list and can relax knowing that my husband will not come home grumpy because there is a pile of dishes or that he is unable to find clean underwear. I am happy that my kid has clean clothes and that there are no socks on the floor for two weeks while we wait for the other person to pick them up. We have seemed to be a little more peaceful as a couple since i have started my housewife training. 

Meal planning

Meal planning
Oh my. I didn't realize how hard meal planning can be. I looked up a lot of websites and now I'm turning to you.
Here is what I have so far:
I made three lists, quick, favorites and new. Then I tried to write down everything that I've cooked and put into those categories. But, now I look at those lists and my eyes are glazing over because I need to make a plan so that I use the list in a budget friendly way. Such as buying in bulk, portioning the items and freezing them, thus making the meals easier.
From my studies I think I should buy a freezer and a lot of ziplock bags. I know one of my sister in law buys large amounts of beef then cooks it with peppers and onions and freezes it for future dinners.
I feel over my head with meal planning...
What are the essentials you need in your house?
How do you make all of this budget friendly?

The successes of today are...I made the beds, cleaned up the front room, 1 load of laundry, dishes and washed the countertops. Sometimes I feel like after I do something homemaker like I did my wifely duty only to be reminded that the day isn't over and there is more to do. It sort of feels a little depressing.

To do list day

Hello fellow housewives ( my husband asked if men could read my blog or if they have to wear a dress to do it and i said i would love if dress wearing men read my blog and asked if he needed a dress so he could participate. sadly he declined.) 

Today's tip is: to do lists

Now I know what you may be thinking, but I tried it today and it seems effective so far. I wrote down 3 things I would like to get done today. Today was, wash dishes as we finish eating and while cooking, two was 1 load of laundry put away and three was go on a date with my husband(it's been months since we did anything without Landon.) 

I almost failed the dishes part. Sometimes I look at the dishes and think, should I do them? But really in the time it takes to think that thought I could have been done with the bowl and spoon. I didn't cook today, I might have done that on purpose so I didn't have to clean more dishes( shhh...the homemaking fairies might smite me, I should have cooked a 4 course meal or roasted a turkey) we ate cereal and a pb and j then for dinner my husband took me out to Taco Bell.( he had never seen a Taco Bell/pizza hut before and wanted to try it with me.) you don't want to know what grandpa fed him because it was unhealthy, high in sugar and very yummy (but he's 3 and he runs every calorie off plus anything grandpa ate he worked it off chasing him)

I did one load of laundry today and folded it, it still is sitting on my couch. I'm waiting for the homemaking fairies to put it away like when Mickey cleans with his mops or when the good fairies in Sleeping beauty makeup their house while she is out flirting. ( mmm, no wonder she poked her finger with the needle, she probably had no clue what it was. Though she should have talked to Cinderella. Now there was a woman who was prepared for being a housewife.) 

The date was...good. Lots of unexpected events. Lets start of by saying that I asked my husband to go on a date with me, he said yes. So I showered,curled my hair, put on make up and a cute outfit. I was ready to rock. He comes home after retrieving his work van from the shop, looks at me, says I look nice. :) then comments that he thought we were going to the dump before our date. What I was wearing was not dump approved. So instead on a nice sweater jacket I grabbed my old hoodie. Hoodies to nothing for newly curled hair, and neither did the pony tail that I ended up putting it in. The dump turn out to be comical because the dumpsters are tall. My husband who is 6'5 could easily throw garbage into them. I on the other hand at 5'6 had to climb metal stairs( not made for heels, every time I climbed the stairs my heel got caught) and throw the metal in. I am curious who thought of putting those stairs toward the back of the dumpsters, it was like walking down a dark alley and sneaking into your apartment because you forgot your keys and you know that your roommates don't lock the glass door (never did it...twice, honest). Later we ended up at Taco Bell had a nice salad( portioned...I don't think lettuce or rice is expensive, but they handed it to me I felt sad and hungry. I honestly think they put just enough in the bowl so I wouldn't complain that I didn't receive my order. It was very delicious though, which made up for the toddler sized portion. We did dessert at the local grocery chain and then we arrived at the movie theater. We debated what movie, we settled on Les Miserables. Hmm...mr. Jackman, I am very happy that you made the cut. ( I actually have a version of Oklahoma that stars him, he is talented) sadly we left he movie before Cozette could sing to her love. Want to know why we left? Because my baby was too Happy. Happy. she was giggling and cooing at the screen. Never in my life did I think I would leave a movie because my baby was too happy. 

I will end it here today. I would love to hear helpful hints and other suggestions to help improve my homemaking skills. 

P.s. draino is a wonderful product and I used it to unclog a very nasty bathroom sink. Not only is it unclogged, but it cleaned the sink too. Or the housewife fairies did, do you think I have to leave a tip? What do you buy a fairy anyway...

When I was young I dreamed of doing many things; a doctor, veterinarian or a superhero finding bad guys with my superhuman powers. It was only a few years ago, that after finishing my degree in psychology that i dreamed that by the time i was 30, i would be a family therapist saving the world one marriage at a time (so i still want to be a superhero and a psychologist )I did not dream that one day I would be sitting the the front room with a toddler whose pooped his pants and an infant who has been sick. ( Dont get me wrong, my kids are the cutest, and if i ever post pictures you would be jealous, because i make beautiful children) I didn't dream that my knight and shining armor would have mental issues one being obsessive about cleaning. I did not dream that after having two children that I would have post pardom depression that would complicate having warm and fuzzy feelings for any of my once loved activities. I did not imagine that my marriage would be shaky and that I would be hear telling the world my story.

 Having no experience or innate homemaking skills and after spending a few hours searching for someone to teach me how to be a homemaker, nothing seemed to really grab me. I felt everytime I clicked on"be a good housewife", people were being vague or naturally (though unnaturally to me) seeking the best homemaker award by making thier house spotless with DIY projects from pining, making elaborate meals for thier toddlers(serious, all my toddler asks for is fries) or ending the night unfolding thier previous made bed, lit candles and a husband who got lucky with a 1950's pinup girl. (At the end of my night I have a screaming toddler who says he doesn't want me, a baby who pukes on my shoulder and a husband working his biskets off at a job that he doesn't enjoy so we can buy the screaming toddler fries. I do not resemble anything close to a pinup)

No one prepared me for this life. I guess in some psychological mumbo gumbo I could blame my mother, but she's in heaven and it would be stupid to blame her when I should have looked into this lifestyle, just in case, I got married.

In 2008, I found the tall,dark and incredibly handsome man that every woman dreams would walk into her life, back her into a wall and kiss her so hard that time and space collapsed and you hope that you had your lucky undies on. Seriously, he's 6'5, lean, arms meant to hold you or punch someone if they hurt you. When we met I compared his body to a swimmers and today, he hasn't changed a bit physically.  Little did my Prince Charming know that the curvy (I don't mean fat), tan and athletic girl would eat her way through two pregnancies, marriage problems and her mother dying to end up curvy (a little overweight, after eating desserts for 9months...anyone would be, plus baby fat doesn't stick to the baby in my world, it sticks to me) my prince doesn't say a word. I joke and say that the only reason he finds baby improved me is because my breasts tripled in size, but he will say, it's not just that, he thinks I'm beautiful. (Just so you know, I have body image issues and I'm working on it)

Soon after we we married, like I assume most couples, you find out that the cute little things like leaving the plate on the floor so he can get back to kissing you, still is there when you go to bed at night because neither of us thought to pick it up, wash it and put it away. Or that your clothes actually have a place to go other than the floor. Or that the when he ate in front of you before being married and you didn't hear him eating, but now when he eats you can hear every bite he takes, and it's not romantic.

It seems to me that there is this joke that our parents were pulling when they missed the part where life is fun and great when you are dating, but if you don't have any homemaking skills, once you are married you will be thrown in to Dante's levels of hell...(no I haven't s read the book, but i want to) No one says, "you know those fantasies of getting married where you are smiling and enjoying each other every minute...those moments still happen when you go to your toddlers Christmas program and all he can do is stand there and sing the wrong words.( joy to the world is now,"going to the world", just so you are aware that you were singing it wrong, not my toddler, he's perfect. At least today.) Most of our fights as a couple surround my lack of homemaking skills. So I am going to try something new and try swallow my pride and be a homemaker.

Until today I have been dragging my feet and giving the stink eye to the mom who plans thier kids birthday party a year in advance, has a sparkling home, has exercised, showered, makeup and hair all done before her little angels awake with bright smiling faces to beautifully cooked eggs Benedict. I honestly feel like the reason that I may feel so much frustration towards them is because they make it look easy and wonderful, thus perpetually giving women the idea that it is, for everyone.  I am jealous. 

Today I start my adventure in becoming a housewife. I will post what I learn because maybe you are a self taught housewife too. Join the journey with me and email me or post tips to do and try. I can use all the help I can get, just don't expect me to debone a feathered animal.